Oh, Hurting

I don't mean to complain or be pissy. Goodness knows, that I'd just like to take a day to myself, if that were possible.

Now, I am sitting here in my underwear because I am afraid that my pants will hurt me when I put them on.

I so wish that I had just an iota of Arthelius' strength or confidence.

I am hurting very badly because of ? Work, certainly. Maybe it was because I had to pee so badly when I got up.

No matter why, I am hurting. Nurse C will call me back and tell me what I can do, hopefully. She has been the one most helpul person in all this debacle.

Oh, and there's a new problem with work. I will elaborate on it later.

See ya'll later. I GTG.

Allergies and troubles

The human form of Arthelius the Ghost, me, has allergies like we all do.

My allergies are few. I am allergic to cedar or any conifer tree. Okay, lots of people are. I am also allergic to powder laundry soap, especially Tide, whose liquid form I do not use. (I use All, the successor to my fav, Surf)

I can get a rash from laying on grass. I guess me and Jen won't ever f on grass, not without a blanket under us.

I thought I was not allergic to any med until I started to take Flomax. this is a medicine that reduces muscle tension in the pelvic region and relieves stress on the prostate. This is most commonly prescribed for BPH, the natural enlargement of the prostate gland.

I am way too young for BPH. My problem is my achy prostate and its infection proneness.
I have had retrograde ejaculaton, where it goes into the bladder, which is weird and worrisome.

I have developed intense itching in my genital area. I have rashes on my left arm and one on my left flank.

Peeing is a bit easier with it but nothing is a remedy worth the achy feeling and malaise Flomax brings.

Dr. E's nurse told me to stop taking it and I will gladly comply. Dr. L may not like it but he can kma. There are other ways to deal with this, surely.

Ah, nevermind all that. This is my weekly respite. wo day away from that horrid monument to greed in.

More info later as this progresses. If you don't like it, then why are you reading it?

Thanks to all who care and love to all friends.

Super Love to my dear one. Love ya, Jen.

100 Degrees

Gosh, it's hotter than a babylon whore outside. I don't mean to be boorish but old metaphors are kinda wore out, ya know?

Owwwwww! My personal unidentified urinary condition was way mellow yesterday. I felt not that bad. But this morning, whoa! It feels like a neutron bomb went off down there, with shocks during every step. I walk kinda fast, but I can't really now. I like to run but it hurts so bad to do it now.

My life is definately impacted by this. I mean, I had to leave work early because the pain was becoming unbearable. Even more so when sitting in the car.

I don't feel like Arthelius on these days. He doesn't sit around in his underwear because wearing pants hurts.

If you want to say a prayer for me or send me a message, it is most welcome. I have some great friends. I am blessed for that.

I go to a new urologist on Tuesday, after Dr. E all but abandoned me.

I do not believe in any medical help anymore.

Mentally Ill?

My stupid urinary system and its mysterious issue have just angered me to the point where I scald my stupid peeny in hot water. There is something wrong with the hot/cold water in my house. The cold cuts out suddenly as some other draw on the water takes it away momentarily. This is not good when one takes a hot shower like I do. I step away as the water gets really hot and maybe my urinary area hurts, a spike in pain brought on by ???

I get very upset and stick my peeny in the hot water. Not for very long. I mean, why make it hurt more than it already does?

The way I am reacting to this unknown urinary condition bothers me greatly. I walk around naked or in my underwear, something I never usually do.

I am a ghost in the online world. I wish I had some of Arthelius' traits, like spectrally hiding his maleness. I am not ashamed of my peeny, no way, I'm just angry that it hurts deep inside.

My anxiety twists this situation into something that hurts not only physically but emotionally as I am not getting the attention from doctors who in reality do not care.

I am awaiting the day Jen finally lets me in. I am afraid this problem will spoil that. No one cares so why should I even attempt to get help?

I am Arthelius the Ghost, I will get through this somehow. Likely with meds that make me feel icky. Doctors poking at my genitals... ew! Why cant the doctor be female? I hate male attention at all.

It's all so sad.

Bad Week

You know, maybe it was my boss cussing me out and belittling me as a Safety Team member, or that bulls**t holiday that worked my anxiety to the breaking point. Maybe it is my so-called 'friends' who don't consider me.

Whatever. I am not getting better. The swelling of my epydemis is once again bad and I can expect testicle pain. No telling when I will go to the doctor as I have been referred to another clinic. I mean, why can't anyone do anything and be accountable?

No calls from them at all.

No calls from anyone at that matter.

And people say they care. Yeah, and if that's true then it is true the pigs grow wings and fly. Right.