Something Ew...

I am unable to understand anal sex. I am revolted by the thought of putting my most sensitive organ in a girl's backside. This is reinforced by the DRE's I have been receiving.

Now I know it is necessary as a diagnostic tool because the angry prostate is literally next door to the rectum. Then I get two today. I don't mind Dr. L. He does not hurt me. But Dr. H. OMG. I get not only a more forceful DRE, I get a prostate massage, which some urologists have written is not as good thing as once thought.

I have had a sexual reaction before, when in therapy for the Kegel exercise. The Kegel exercise works the muscle that ejects the seminal fluid from the body. The therapist told me so. And gosh, I did have the same fluid drip like today when Dr. H poked my prostate three times in a none too gentle way.

I did not ask for that. I can come on my own, thank you.

I feel terrible. I still hurt and now I have to leave work early to have an MRI. I get off at 8 pm every day.

I will not even try to do the m-thing for a few days. I feel distinctly unsexual, a rare thing in my life.

The water heater thermostat failure that occurred on tuesday makes that for certain. Ever take a cold shower? It isn't fun.

My feelings oscillate. Yes, I am still looking at Aug. 19th as the last day of my life. I don't know if I can make it even until then.

I sure don't feel like Arthelius now, who had crossed the great divide some time ago.

He would say, 'Isn't fun being spectral, even if I did it with Spectral Madonna.'

How typical, as in life. Too bad I'm not that way. I'd be more of a man than I am.

I do need mental help. I may use BCBS's own resources to find one. 'Have to', says Dr. H. 'Obama will render us unable to help people'.

I don't believe that. It cannot be the way of government to so infringe on basics of life. It violates the Constitution. If we were so split on stupid ideals, perhaps none of this would have happened.

Ideals, look at the idiots who voted against Judge Sotomayor. Why did they vote 'nay'? No party or ideal speaks for me, why for them?