Glasses Stress

You've seen enough pictures of me to know that I wear glasses. Have since I was 12. I am strongly myopic (near-sighted) and cannot see without them.

When I woke up this afternoon, I couldn't find them. I take them off when I sleep, have to, only a fool would sleep with them on. They could easily get broken that way.

When I sleep, I keep my glasses in a hard shell eyeglass case that I received with my last pair of glasses. I normally put it on the top of my bed's headboard, near where my radio is.

However, when I went to sleep this morning, I must have not done that. I woke up and couldn't find it and panicked. Oh, fuck, I cannot see without my glasses, everything's one big blur and there's no depth perception.

If I go without them for very long, a headache would form. Do you know how it feels when your eyes hurt? It sucks for real.

Not that my glasses are all that. They constantly slide down my rather oily nose (thanks Dove) and distort the focal point of my vision. This causes eye strain and gives me a headache. Staring at a white screen like most of the internet is also gives me a headache. I can change WordPerfect X5 to the ancient blue of its first versions which doesn't hurt my eyes.

I hate not being able to see. In the times I had sex, I couldn't see the female I was with. I do not know how Malee looks naked, I couldn't see her. My first gf. I remember vaguely. That was 14 years ago. Hopefully if I have another, I can see her.

The male mind is visually stimulated. I know this from personal experience.

Another thing about glasses.

They are damned expensive. This pair I wear presently cost in the neighborhood of $400. And that was with two different discounts they gave me because I have been a customer there since I was a teenager.

My vision is not getting progressively worse the eye doctor said. In fact, it is not as bad as the last time I went. I do not know what is going on with that. I can't see distant things nor can I wear normal sunglasses. I have a fit over kind that I didn't like at first but I took to them. I'll post a picture of me with them on if anyone asks.

I am developing a glaucoma said the eye doctor. I may be increasingly blind as I age if nothing changes in the field of eye health.

No thank you to eye surgery. My vision problem is not related to the lens or cornea, it is the shape of my eyes. Can't change that.

No thank you to contacts. I hate poking myself in the eye. A lifelong resistance ingrained in us at an early age, do not poke yourself in the eye.

More than that, I look funny without my glasses. They have been part of my identity for so long.

I am prone to allergy itching, tearing up. Nothing is worse than smoke or the dairy vault in the back of a grocery store (stocking milk makes me sneeze always).

I also have emotive feelings sometimes when I am stressed or I am confronted with something emotional.

My eyes are blue, usually red because I do not sleep all that well. My bed is uncomfortable but that is a topic for a separate post.

I have been getting head pain from my glasses not being in place on my face. I can't take Tylenol every day. It's bad for ya.