Hurting More

I am sorry if I haven't been updating my blog. I have not felt like it. I have a hard time writing anything. It is grief, still but I recently started taking Zoloft which has fucked my mind up badly. 

I can't have an orgasm, not easily, it causes aneorgasmia. This is bad for me because, yes, I still feel stimulation like normal, it is that this constant production of fluids and hormones has to be purged to keep it from building up, becoming a focus for an infection.

It has happened before. 

I have this strange feeling, I don't feel like myself. I am sharp mentally yet cannot write. I sleep erratically. I feel mealy-headed. 

I am hurting more in the prostate area. This is related to the aneorgasmia and possibly stress because I am upset that I can't write.

I get confused sometimes when normally, that has never happened. I have a hard time expressing myself. 

This medicine is eroding my mind, it feels. I will ask the doctor to ease off on it to see if the benefit it provides, soothing my hair-trigger panic reaction, outweighs this eroding it's doing to my mind. 

I did shave and took check pictures. I shaved face and body but I won't post any of them if no one asks. 

I want to talk about MeUndies again but now isn't the right time. 

I just feel not up to it.